Monday, August 4, 2008

The truth we hid

From each other is that we both don't like living in the Black Hills.

We did before, in that interesting time when we still lived where we were told. Actually, this is the third time Taciturn has lived here. But now, when he has no job and volunteerism is not working in a place where damn it, people should pick their sorry asses up and do for themselves, he is facing the truth I began to face months ago.

It is time to go back home to Missouri. Or, at least start making plans to do that.

In the past, he had told me several times that the Black Hills was the one place on earth that would make him happy. He could live no place else. If I wanted to live somewhere else, go ahead, he would miss me. It never made sense to me. We have no family in the area, few friends (Dakotans don't trust folks who are from outside the state, folks they call "easterners." People for the most part are superficially nice but don't take it from there.), no real ties except for the house we own which is too big and out in the country in an inconvenient location.

There is a reason I call myself Episcogranny. I need those lovely little people in my life more than three days every two to three months. And while I was gone this past week, something started stirring in his head. He missed me while I was gone. And one of his volunteer jobs called him and said they no longer needed him. That makes this the third of the jobs he's tried that has rejected him. His hospice volunteer position uses him but not as much as he would like to work.

I had made it known before I left that I could not live here anymore. We had spoken of moving to a town north of here. I brought that up to let him know I had heard him when he said he had to live in the Black Hills. But when I started telling him when I was gone that I had seen houses for sale in Missouri that were wonderful, he told me in a wonderful way that he heard me.

Home is going to be in the St. Louis area. We both have ties there that existed before we met. He attended med school there. My mother grew up in Soulard. We met and married in the Metro East area (the Illinois suburbs). If we had not met, my plan was to live in Soulard myself. Our favorite restaurant is Cunetto's on the Hill.

Best of all, I'll only be an hour and a half from my grandchildren. At present it is 850 miles from door to door.

Our plan is to use the winter to clean stuff out, touch up the paint and trim in the interior, and put the house on the market in the spring. Fortunately, the housing slump has not hit Rapid City. Houses in our neighborhood have a quick turnover. I have our former realtor coming over in a couple of weeks to tell us what needs to be done to get the place ready to sell.

And...I'll be geographically close to Kirkepiscatoid!


FranIAm said...

Oh my- what great news!

I will be praying for you all that this happens in the way that you wish!

Ruth Hull Chatlien said...

I'm excited for you. It will be so good for you to have more time with your grandkids.

Kirkepiscatoid said...


One of my best buds and her husband are leaving Kirksville. God closes doors and opens windows. 150 miles is not all that far, and you can also see our mutual buddy like "the old days!"

(Excited? Who me?)

KarenAll Over said...

Wow! I don't know if anyone knows for sure how retirement will affect them. I'm glad both you and Taciturn have a plan to make you both happy!

Someday I may even update my blog! LOL

All the best - I just sold my home for a profit (in FL!) so I know it will work out for you. :) Karen

bethoc said...

WOW! Good for you both for your separate but equal discernment! Prayers for your future.

Cathy said...

I am glad to know you are going to be able to be closer to your grandchildren and that you have both been able to make that decision to move! Great news!